Why do some people achieve success and others fail? The list is very long, but I will attempt to identify some of the reasons. After all, we all start out with potential and yet we never achieve success. As a teacher, I often hear reasons (excuses) why they never mastered math or passed English. The reasons range from bad teachers, no parental support or lack of skills. What is your excuse?
Successful people do not blame others for their failure. They find ways to succeed despite the difficulty. In some ways, it is how universities determine who they accept to their schools. Sure, they look for good grades, but they also look for students who do not accept failure. How do you succeed when you do not have successful role models in your life? What if the most successful people are the drug dealers in your neighborhood? Measuring success in terms of money is what young people do.
They look up to rappers, sports stars, or actors because they do not have other successful people in their lives. I do not have a problem with being a fan, but it should not be the only role model in their lives. I like or admire some musicians, sports stars and even some actors, but I would not blindly accept or follow what my idols would suggest or do. When you are young and impressionable, you are influenced by the people around you or who you may spend time watching or listening.
This is not going to be a rant about how the words of rap songs are influencing our young people, but more about how you can help your children become successful. It should be obvious if that is the only thing in your child’s life. There are a lot of distractions in a young person’s life! There is far more than I ever had in my life. It was a huge deal in my life when I could just have a portable radio. iPods, iPads, electronic games are the routine now.
Normally, technology improves our lives, but I am not so sure in this case. As an adult, I enjoy riding my bicycle listening to music. I can now listen to my songs I selected or downloaded versus what a radio station may select. It is a huge improvement thanks to technology. Children use the same device before and after school. Some students listen to their iPods during school because of lenient teachers. It should not matter except that a young person does not concentrate the same as an adult.
Why does this all matter? You develop habits in twelve or thirteen years of school. If the good habits are not reinforced at home or elsewhere, you will learn many bad habits. I know some people used to listen to music when they did homework, but it is different when it occurs in school too. We can blame the school system, but the parents are also part of this problem. Expectations and accountability is a big part of success! My parents expected me to succeed and held me accountable.
It starts early! Parents influence their children in many ways you do not even realize. If your children see you reading or doing something positive, they will too. If they see you doing something negative such as drinking as a solution to a problem or blaming others for your problems, you learn that too. If your children see you taking classes or some other training to better yourself, they learn that too. Children learn from your actions from getting into debt and complaining about money to abuse. Is this what you want?
Parents blame education and education blames parents for many of its problems. Each has their responsibilities. If you have a bad teacher, get tutoring or change classes or schools. Are your children doing everything they can do be successful in school? School is the first step in a successful life! A good college wants high grades because it indicates mastery of the subjects. It is one of the criteria to measure success. High grades in college allow you to land the best jobs with the highest pay.
Employers are looking for success in school/college as an indication of success in their company. It is not the only factor, but it is an important one. I know my grades influenced the Fortune 100 Corporation to hire me, but also what else I accomplished. Last, it was how well I fit with the other people in the department. This factor is commonly called soft skills and how well you interview. Companies are looking for skills and experience that indicate you will succeed. School is just one element!
What can you do as a parent or individual to succeed in life? You need to emulate people who are successful. In order to provide the greatest flexibility, doing well in school and meeting or exceeding expectations in everything you do. It may be other people’s expectations until you can establish your own. Planning your future rather than just taking what happens is important too. I wrote an article some time ago called Do Your Resume Backwards which addresses planning for your future.
When I was a child, I had a choice of participating in sports or clubs or other organizations. There is so much more now to occupy your child’s life. As a parent, you need to consider the impact of your child’s friends, peers and what you child may do to occupy their time. Positive activities such as sports and other youth organizations are much better than just sitting and playing games. Children do not naturally gravitate to what is good for them, they need guidance. Are you helping your children or not?
Success in life does not just happen! It takes a conscious effort..Children make choices based on what is offered or allowed. If failure or low expectations are acceptable, how do you expect your children to succeed? If you do not hold your children accountable for their choices, you are teaching them to fail. If you do not have high expectations, you are not helping your children to succeed. How do you know how much you can accomplish until you try? It is up to you! Success is achieving something you set out o do.
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Success is achieving something you set out o do.